The Worst Hangover I’ve Ever Had

Oh man, so many to choose from… I could tell you about the time I drank a half-bottle of JD, then (most of) a half-gallon of Scottish Ale, then went back for seconds of the whiskey, and spend the night puking/ passed out on the floor in a frat house bathroom, or the time I drank (most of) a bottle of Ketel One and seriously could barely move for 3 days. But I think I’ll tell about the time I drank so much that I was sick for a week, and didn’t drink again for 4 full years.

It was the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of high school. I know, I was a little young. But I had never been drunk before, and some older friends decided I needed a lesson. We spent the evening hanging out in the hot tub and drinking all of everything. If you know what I mean. We had beer, we drank wine, we made cocktails, I drank straight vodka, I did shots of whiskey, I had enough tequila to stop a charging rhino. The other guys didn’t think I was drunk yet because I didn’t really slur my speech (I still don’t slur when I’m drunk), so they kept feeding it to me, and I guzzled it all down.

I don’t know when it started to go bad, but at some point I realized I was in trouble. By midnight I was puking in the bushes. By 1am I was unconscious, but thankfully I got a lot of the poison out before I passed out so I didn’t drown in my puke. I don’t remember waking up the next day, but when I did, I was still very much drunk. My first memory from that day was riding with my GF to the movie theater to see Days of Thunder. Nothing but fast action and jump-cuts. At one point, I had to get up and run out of the theater to puke in a trash can. I was sick for a week.

Luckily I was in high school and out for the summer, so I didn’t have much to do besides nurse the worst hangover I would ever know. Right there and then, I swore an oath to not drink alcohol, and I maintained that oath for four years, until the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college. I made it the rest of the way through high school, including an insane senior year, and through my freshman year of college without drinking even one drop of alcohol, all because of a lesson I learned when I was 15.

Media Credit

The featured image for this article is Day072-5_June by flickr user Kristina. It is available under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic (CC BY-ND 2.0) license.

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Rick Allen

Rick Allen

Rick is a Film Buff, Tolkien Nerd, Cigar Aficionado and Whiskey Fiend.

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