What would you do if you had the One Ring?

What would you do if you had the One Ring?

I would do what every one of us would do: TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD.

Keep Calm and Try to Take Over The World

It wouldn’t start that way. I would start out with the intention of destroying it. I would plan to find a magical volcano to throw it into, or drop it to the bottom of the ocean, or in some other way try to put it so far out of reach that it never fell into the hands of men again.

But somewhere along the way I would find that by using the Ring just a little, I could do some small measure of good, maybe to help my family, or something. Then I would figure out that I could do even more good with the Ring, but I might need to run for some local office or something, to really make a difference. And of course, with the Ring, it would be easy to win, because of my powerful charisma.

Once I was elected, I could really do some good, not just for a few people, but for the whole community. For example, everyone wants to feel safe, so we invest heavily in public safety. What’s a few extra dollars on your tax bill, when it comes to your family’s safety? We need a strong police force, after all. We’ll all need to tighten our belts a little, but that builds character. I mean, I won’t have to, of course, but everyone else will. And you should all make a donation to my campaign, because I’ll be running for state office in the next election. So pay up, in you want to keep yourself safe. You do want to be safe, don’t you?

But think of all the good we can do when we relocate all these great jobs to our state! All those industries need a place to operate, and our people need good jobs, so we’ll just offer them some great incentives to relocate. They won’t really mind when I rescind those offers in a year or two, but by then of course, it will be too late. But because I’m a generous leader, I’ll relax the environmental protections and the workers rights protections just a little, just to make it up to them. That’s what’s good for everyone, after all. Everyone needs to sacrifice a little something.

And you’ll want to stay on my good side, because I’m running for federal office next term, and I intend to win, no matter what. And once I’m there, I can really do some good.

I’ll make sure everyone is extremely safe, and all of our enemies will know that their time is short. Very short, in fact. And our allies will want to stay in our favor, because they saw what happened to our enemies, and to those one or two allies that dared to oppose me. But it’s all for everyone’s good, of course, to keep everyone safe, and to make sure the people are all happy and cared for. And if they don’t like it, well it’s their loss. Literally. I’ve destroyed many of them who opposed me. No one can oppose me. My armies will march across the world bringing safety and happiness to the masses, and each one will pay tribute to me. They are all mine. I am their master!

And that’s how it goes with the Ring. Everything you begin in goodness ends up in evil. And none of us could resist it.

The Featured Image for this post is Day 175…One Ring by flickr user bandita. Is is available under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic license.

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Rick Allen

Rick Allen

Rick is a Film Buff, Tolkien Nerd, Cigar Aficionado and Whiskey Fiend.

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